Friday, September 04, 2009

The week that was.

A weekly round-up of events that make news can suffice to spill over an MS word page, which when splattered across the blog would entitle the author a much needed sigh of relief and a non-blogging-guilt-free pass for over a week or two. :)

This past week, our very own Force-Indianized Kingfishi-chella earned himself and his team a podium finish, (which caused considerable beer-logging on the roads of Bangalore, near the Mallya residence especially). And there were some nitpickers who smelled hardly anything Indian about the victory, claiming it’s the Italian driver who has done it for the Force India team.

Ha! Talk of Italian drivers. Morons who do you think is driving our country for the last five an half years.

And when MS gill was asked what does the future of motor-sports in India look like, in the wake of this momentous victory. His curt response was:


No mincing words.

The big shocker of the week was the AP CM YSR's sad demise. No fooling around with this piece of news folks.

Our correspondent Quick gun-Ajay devgan has reported a Dosa - Saambhar story : Pak trashed the Indian Dossier on 26/11, following which the mood at the Indian embassy in Pakistan was Sombre. Now he expects us to giggle at that, paah adaa paavi!

Following a sizzling news story at office can be fun as well as highly rewarding, a hard fought cricket match, a missing CM, an ongoing terrorist strike. In most of these cases the bosses are the most ill-informed of the lot, and here is the chance for the alert rookies,( who are dead determined to break the news to their managers) to win some brownie points. Despite people having PCs at their respective seats, 3-4 people have to huddle around one monitor, to read about a developing news story. The radio-commentary-camaraderie of yore. The bosses eventually get sucked into it and casually ask about the development, this is when all of the employees who were hitherto arming themselves to the teeth with the news-fact-ammunition, shoot their arrows towards their boss. The winner is the one who presents the most startling and invigorating account of the event laced with unheard of factoids. Example-

Boss (to the huddle): "Have they found him, the CM ??" (Thought bubble : Let me show them my human face...for the timebeing)

Emp1 : (grabs the opp) "No sir, apparently the helicopter had crashed, while it was heading for chittoor in some forest named Nala...Nala...

Emp2 : (Jumps in) Nalamalla forests and the names of the pilots were S K Bhatia and captain M S Reddy. The helicopter's name was Bell-430 about 10 years old and...

Emp3: The area is dense and infested with tigers and the chenchu tribes, they are one of the most primitive tribes in india, their history dating back to...

Boss : "Have they found him, the CM ??"

and then irrespective of the answer he gets, he makes an all-encompassing statement about the incurable rot in the system and moves on, which leaves all the three employees vigorously nodding in approval.

(each employee's thought bubble : "The other two assholes are bloody leaches, nevertheless the boss looks impressed with my alertness")

So until next time, learn the art. :)

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