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Thursday, July 30, 2009

The kind of people who are around you!

(Caution : Extreme sarcasm ahead)

Who forward ppts about philosophy of life and happiness as email attachments, with lots of pics of kids and flowers.

Who use the word- "did" followed by a past tense form of any verb in sentences, they speak/write. For Ex- "I did not went there yesterday".

When they press the 'enter' key after typing some lines on a chat window, the Enter-keystroke can be heard within a radius of 20ft.

Who hope that they don't stumble upon any known face, while they step out of the office lavatory. These guys wear an apologetic look on their faces and are trying to communicate with their body language : "Dint get time in the morning yaar!!".

Who act as if they are searching for their friend in the crowd, but actually are checking out a particular girl. The girl is completely aware of the fact, contrary to the belief of the gentleman.

Who hope that any of their friends gets tagged in some random album so that they can run through the entire album, searching for pretty sights.

Who post stuff on their blog, and go to the extent of tattooing the link of the post onto their bodies to bargain for an appreciative comment or two.

Who always claim their credit limit is maxed out, and so you have to book the movie tickets from your card for the group/that particular person.

Who indulge in urinal-dialogues, that is talking to the adjacent urinal occupant while taking a piss, which irritates you to no end.

Who write their profile names on orkut/facebook in Capital letters.

Who make it a point to stash away some 45 chilly flakes and oregano sachets when they order a pizza.

Who often keep their cellphones in their shirt pockets.

Who write ROFL / LMAO/ ROFLMAO without actually knowing the full form.

Who use the same Bisleri pet bottle for two years to store and drink tap-water from.

Who keep the phone at a 45 degree angle with their ear while talking.

Who play Orkut game applications and get excited after a high score which they publish gleefully.

Who mull over calling back that Nigerian businessman who has offered them to part with his cash, for a little help.

Who recommend "You can win" by Shiv kheda to random people.

Who hail Chetan bhagat as the best thing to happen to Indian literature.

Who post word-art(for ex- A guitar made of hashes and asterisks) as orkut-testimonials to friends.

Who don't know how to react and what to say, when some-one thanks them graciously.

Who look away from the camera while posing for a shot, when they are wearing Aviators.

Who have secretly clicked the "Unlike" button on Facebook at some point of time.

Who actually click on the Google ads.

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30 Mirch lagi kya?? paani piyo yaha..

Blogger Shashank said...

Good one!!!
Bhaiya Bisleri ki do-teen bottles to do chaar saal se humare kamre me bhi padi hian:P

btw, ab is list ki lambai badhaye bina bhala humse kahan raha jata...so here go a few from my side too -

1. Who think that the 4000 watt speakers in their rooms are for community service

2. Who keep their volume while speaking on phone proportional to the distance of the place to which the call has been made

3. Who are 5 ft tall and few inches thin but do not hesitate to threaten anyone from beating him up

4. Who howl "oooooooooo" whenever there is a power cut and its dark around.

5. Who take a piss on the walls of a "Sulabh Shauchalaya"

1:26 PM  
Blogger The Misdirected Arrow said...

Who write a post first on facebook and then post the same thing on the blog without even adding a single point :P

3:09 PM  
Blogger The Misdirected Arrow said...

who on being smirked upon go ahead and edit the post adding 3 new points :P

4:59 PM  
Anonymous 15 aug said...

4: Who call you in the middle of your work just because they have nothing else to do! :)

5:09 PM  
Blogger Mads said...

sahi post hai... :D :D :D
can't think of more, sorry :-s

7:44 PM  
Blogger Prasoon said...

You nailed it here -
Who hope that any of their friends gets tagged in some random album so that they can run through the entire album, searching for pretty sights. - hehehe. You are facebook a lot it looks like! :D

9:37 PM  
Blogger Madhuri said...

Sarcastic to the hilt! Fantastic..
How about,

The ones who use sweety and bebes thinking it is "cool".

Who gift love cheques and love debit cards because it is an expression of true louve

9:47 PM  
OpenID vogonosphere said...

Found the post on desipundit. Good list! How about people who retell movie stories just after you finished watching it with them? And people who can not cut the umblical cord with their college and refer to it in every third sentence?

9:37 AM  
Blogger Shankster said...

google ads se to tera hukka pani bhi chalta hai hero! jis thali mein khate ho usi mein ched!!

10:46 PM  
Blogger Ketan said...

Sarcastic?

I felt you were pretty straightforward there!

Enjoyed reading!

BTW, nowadays, I'm trying to see 'positive side' of people. But whatever positive side I get to see, is either uninteresting or has orifices!

TC.

1:06 AM  
Anonymous ankita said...

who thinks that 'nice post' , 'cool' and such comments are serious ones...

kya baat hai..raita faila diya. :-P

6:21 PM  
Anonymous abhishek said...

Thankfully the doors in my office lavatory is not fully enclosed till the bottom; there's a substantial gap through which I can look out for shadows coming in for the urinals. You get the idea, right?

So, I can crawl out surreptitiously only when there's no one out. So, I don't have to make any excuses

11:40 PM  
Blogger Shaunak said...

First of all, jumped from Mads' blog.
Second, Bheja fry my favourite food.
Third, killer post!

One from my side:

# Who roll down their car windows and blast music at 10,000 decibels, speed up for five meters before stopping at the signal up ahead.

11:37 PM  
Blogger B S B said...

Aby, I'll add a few...

1. Who think pasting a Ferrari label on their car bonnet makes it a Ferrari.
2. Who think fwding a "Send it to 10 people, you'll get lucky within 10 days", will bring them luck in 10 days.
3. Who think Rajnikanth is THE best actor, EVER.
4. Who talk of French, German, Latin, Scandinavian and Hindi in the same vein - all faren languages.

3:42 PM  
Blogger Abhi said...

who stands a little from his seat to fart to minimize the Bass, though its olfactory characteristic remains the same.

9:59 AM  
Blogger Rushabhh Gandhi said...

All the guys n gals who were Extended Boxers promoted by Katrina Kaif with shoes and go for a movie @ multiplexes...

who always shout and honk loudly without any reason when they are passing from the tunnels....

10:44 PM  
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3:49 PM  
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10:49 AM  
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Keep on posting such stories. I love to read articles like this. By the way add some pics :)

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