Thursday, January 10, 2008

Space bar!

Happy birthday to all *hic* ....or was it the new year!! .Hang *stayed* over. Someone asked me how merry was your Christmas, I replied ki "Yaar jitni merry Christmas utni teri bhi Christmas". Equality u see.

On the christmas eve my jarurat se bhi jyada techie friend came back from office with a release-date-near-hai-bhai look on his face. He crash landed on the chair and was about to relieve him of his shoes. Just as he was about to untie his shoelaces he looked up, raised his eyebrows, and I got the hint ( May day! May day!) and I pulled the quilt over my head in a flash. We don't buy All-out and other mosquito repellents for obvious reasons.

He peeled the soggy socks of his calf and then gagged his shoes with them. God help those shoes. And before anybody could figure it out he hung those very socks anticipating Hohoho Santa to stuff his WMD (Without months of Dhulaai/Weapons of mass destruction) socks with I-phones and pen-drives filled with porn. In the morning instead of the gifts, we found two assorted Santas lying unconscious on the floor of our apartment, probably asphyxiated. Sad!

Events as strange and as rare as road rollers performing wheelies and double century Indian opening stands in Strayya (Australia) - dotted the week going into the new year's eve.

On the Boxing night (26th dec) i was tapping away keys in my cubicle to put together a piece of code that could perform some kind of desired Sh**t. When I was done, it was already 7:50 pm. The buses were scheduled to depart at 8:30, and so I had some 40 minutes to test the code. It takes nearly 20 minutes to test the code as the servers are situated in Canada. And so 22 long drawn yawns later, to my utter shock I found the test results negative.

"Iski param pujya maataji ki…" I exclaimed.

The time was 8:15. Another 15 minutes left. Absolutely no time for parsing through the code and let the 'Kannada' client machine negotiate with the 'Canada server' for a green test result. Wo kya bolte hai angrezi me "pissed off". I decided to stay on and complete the job and the give the bus a miss, (Are u reading boss?). With a hurt ego well communicated by that beeped stress buster I rummaged through the code and good lord what did I find?? I forgot to insert a space between two keywords in the code snippet, and that caused the test to do an "Ishaan awasthi" (prior to aamir's entry).

I tested it again and 'Bingo!' The test ki murgi 'lays' a green egg. Sadly the time was 8:50 and all the buses had ‘left at the right’ time.

(Un)Luckily My team mate had also stayed back trying to learn Portuguese by reading the photo-captions of tanned brazillian ladies on orkut. Skill set addition he says.

He’s a compulsive biker and he offered me a hitch hike to my PG not before making me learn a few Portuguese phrases well illustrated with adjoining pics. He calls it a pictionary.

On a night which was as black as godrej ki kaali mehendi, two guys were burning rubber on the Hosur road ( A parking lot that leads to my home on my way back from office!).
He was riding the bike and I was weathering the chilling wind perched on the pillion seat, hero heeralal style. We were accompanied by a senior team-mate who was on his enfield.

Just as we were halfway through, an eicher van (mini lorry) hit us from behind at a speed which will make Narayen karthikeyan look like a non-‘racist’. We were badly hit. I was tossed in the air and by the time I could shout out any expletives I found myself rolling on the road with the headlights of the incoming vehicles blinding me. My cellphone aah! That was the last I saw of it.

All my notes, all ad scripts which I stored, short stories, ideas, post themes and what not (bhaai poore 2 litre ki bottle thi creative juice se bhari huyee, jo maine apne cellphone ke fridge me rakhi thi) , shattered to bits and bytes right before my eyes. *sigh*

(readers se kripya namra nivedan hai (polite request) ki mere cellphone ki durghatna me mrityu par 5 second ka maun vrat rakhe (observe a silence for 5 seconds). Wo cellphone jisne iss blog ko 80 posts diye hai. *sniff*)

After I rolled on the road nearly 10-15 times I got up immediately to save whatever bone, skin and flesh I was left with, from the incoming vehicles. My shirt was in tatters, if it hadn’t been for the fresh bruises and gashes peeping out of the tore portions, I could have stood a chance to gather some chawannis and atthannies.

I looked around for my friend.

Then what I saw froze my blood. Our bike was being dragged by that lorry on the road for nearly 100mts. I couldn’t see my friend. Then he emerged from the ruins on his feet. He was looking absolutely dazed. He was accompanying the bike for the 1st 10 mts and then he was thrown aside. I shouted at him "Any Head injuries??". Silence. He was staring into the oblivion. He replied after a pause "No!".

But I had sustained one. I was trying to concentrate on every minute detail I could, in my vicinity so that I shouldn’t pass out. These head injuries are like ticking time bombs. And I HAD some unlucky friends.

We were rushed to the hospital immediately. I could still walk. None of my bones and joints betrayed me. People who were a witness to the accident, said they thought it was all over. Such was the veracity.
The doctors there at the hospital reassured me that the head injury wasn’t that grave I believed it to be. No scans were needed they said. I called the senior doctor "Aap bataao uncle! Ye fresher doctor colg me kitni padhaai karte hai mere ko pata hai..". He reassured me with a quick check up and a smile "Don’t worry!!"

And the bheja is still garam!! :) Come to think of it it all happened coz of a SPACE missed.

P.S. : My friend is recuperating at his home. He was discharged from the hospital 4 days later.
P.P.S.: And I am posting this piece from my office, iska matlab apun changa hai.


22 Mirch lagi kya?? paani piyo yaha..

Anonymous Revathi said...

That was scary man!! you should be thanking god a million times a minute that you are still in one piece. hope the injuries were superficial and u r ok now. and i think the part which saddened me the most was 'aapke cell phone ki mauth'. i really did observe the 5 second ka silence.
Nice post BTW!! :)

1:34 PM  
Anonymous Mayank said...

Hey...I'm glad that both of you are fine. After all this still....Happy new year.

1:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

good that both of you escaped from an accident of this intensity almost almost unhurt. May your cell phone's soul rest in piece... oops! peace ;-)


3:32 PM  
Blogger Sam said...

o teri.... kya style se gaya re tu... cell phone ke liye khed hai... par jaan bachi to lakho paye...
chal hope ur frnd gets fine soon enuf!!! tc..

3:33 PM  
Blogger Vandita said...

wow ... just glad that ure fine now, that was scary...
and i did observe silence for ur prized cellphone
take care

6:58 PM  
Blogger Bubbles of FireWhisky said...

jeez... trust u 2 pull d funny out f somethin as serious as tat... bt on a sombre note... im glad u guys r ok...

n abt d cellfone... m so srry 4 ur loss...

9:27 AM  
Blogger Itchingtowrite said...

hey, thank god u r fine... that was scary
take care

3:06 PM  
Blogger Prasoon said...

first things first -
uss bike ka kya hua? :O :O shraddhanjali deni padegi ya fir toote angoN ke saath wo bhi kahin kissi service garage mein padi hai ki kab uski marrammat shuru hogi? yaar mujhe uss bike ki chinta ho rahi hai ki kahin wo inn govt haspatalon ki laparwahi ke jaise, ek screw-driver ke darshan tak na kar paye n intezaar karte karte uss bike ka model fiat ki tarah purana na pad jaye... :P

Cell phone ki durgati sunn kar atyant dukh hua and aasha karte hain ki ab aapke haath mein ek naya cell phone aa chuka hoga ;-)

Aapko waise soochit kiya jaata hai ki aap bike pe zara sambhal ke baithen and bike chalak se anurodh kijiyega ki wo bike zara saavdhaani se chalayein. Saath hi saath, aap zara space key ka soch samajh hi upyog kara karein ki saala ek space, ek space saala GBF ko hospital pahuncha sakti hai :(

3:16 PM  
Blogger ŋεεяѕ said...

woah! glad ure both okay now.

11:37 PM  
Blogger gunj said...

ok dat reminds me of a famous quote....jako rahe saiyan...maar sake na koi!!
god bless u!!

8:06 PM  
Blogger Garam Bheja Fry said...

# revathi

Now i am doin good! cell phone ki maut ke sadme me raha kuch din phir naya cell adopt karna pada!! :(
thanx for the bhishes!

# mayank

thankooz re!! aaj aankho me aansu hai tumlog ka pyaar dekh kar!! :P

# LadyG

its resting in now a small portion of hosur road would have been coated with the corpse of my cellphone. :(

# sam

Jaan bachi to laakho paaye...sacchee me yaara..cel phone ka koi gum-fevicol nahee hai apun ko..haanth pair bheja salamat hai nas wahich kaafi!

# vandz

thnks re for the concern! may the soul RIP!

# bubbles

Glad hai hum bhi!! bach gaye!! aah blog pe aur post aate rahnege ab..!

7:10 PM  
Blogger Garam Bheja Fry said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

7:10 PM  
Blogger Garam Bheja Fry said...

# itching2write

Thanks ji!!

# prasoon

uss bike ki hum photos daalne waale the!! lekin en wakt par upload nahee kar paaye!! kaafi dardnaak manzar tha bike kaa! thankooz re for the concern!! ab masti fir se chaaloo hai!!

# gunj & neers

Thanks for the concern ppl. u are my strength.

7:13 PM  
Blogger The Indian Frog said...

mini lorry wale ne kaam theek se nahi kiya.. ;-P..
are bhai jaan bachi so laakhon paaye..

samhal ke rehna..

3:16 PM  
Blogger Koi Bhi Purana 21inch ka TV said...

tu sala moti chamdi hai....kuch nahi hoga tere ko.....lorry wala bach gaya na???...;-)

6:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Haan bhai Narayan,

Nimnlikhit vakya ka arth samjhane ka kastth karenge?
"Thanks for the concern ppl. u are my strength"

Time hai sudhar jaa.....PAUPA

11:48 AM  
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