GBF reporter ki reports!!

“Yuvraj packing six sixes of a Broad over and a six packed Shahrukh going over board” were the two drool-worthy sights of the past month. (Abey itti jaldi sentence padh gaya…dhang se dekh to sahee kitni mehnat gayee hai likhne me..).
 My friends tell me that the abs are nothing but the sediments of the “40+” capsules he has been gulping all along, which are now showing up; quite a sick thought actually. Kya shahrukh bhaai...sunken cheeks and 5 ½ kg hairs on your scalp sadly makes you look more like my Patiyaale waale taauji, minus the abs though. For my patiyaale waale taauji six pack means cheh (six) peti aur har peti me 8 khambe (full botal).

(isse pehle ki dard-e-disco morcha ke workers ransack my house aur maar maar kar mere 3-4 abs nikaal de..i better switch the topic)

So let’s just summarize the events of the past 1 month.

1. India wins the tonti tonti wolld cup :- An unforgettable experience , the finest week of Indian cricket, The exuberance of youth and……. (ek belly khujaata huaa Reader: oye bhejafry beta aaraam se ..ye to aisa lag raha hai ki cricinfo ki site khol ke baith gaya hoon, yaa phir maine siddhu ke chor pocket waali diary khol li hai, apni aukaad me reh …angrezi tere aur shoaib malik dono ke bas ki nahee hai)

Haa to bhaai, let us tell you some inside stories….

Brett lee bowling to shoaib malik. Malik is beaten comprehensively. Lee comes up to shoaib and says :

Brett lee : (shift dabaa ke 1436732 type kar le reader…arey bhaai gaaliyaa dee aur kya…ab kaun see gaali di ye to naa shoaib ko pata naa hi mere ko.)

Shoaib : “I unite your mother and sister in next shot”

(agle shot me mai tumhaari maa behen ek kar dunga)

Brett lee: (enraged) “teri maa ki..”

(don’t ask me brett lee ne kahaan se seekha ye)


The cheerleaders talking to each other during a match..

Ch1: “chameli behen, aaj raat mere kamar par thoda iodex mal dena, naachte naachte toot gayee hai meri naazuk kamariyaa”

Ch2: “Kyu nahee behna, jab bhi ye naaspeeta yuvraj batting pe aata hai, kamar toot jaati hai, ab kya bataau ghar par boodhi maa ke ilaaz aur chhote bhaai ki padhaai keliye kitne sitam jhelne padte hai humey “

Ch1: “sahee kahaa…aur to aur ye India Pakistan ke log…uffff.. chaahe kisi bhi team ka chauka padey…khush ho jaate hai..naach dekhne ko jo milta hai”

Ch2 : “Ye cameraman bhi kam nahee hai muaa, ball boundary cross karne se pehle hi itna zoom kar dete hai idhar ki mere face ke pimple bhi dikh jaaye logo ko”

A jubilant indian fan : “oye gori mem, mere saath Nach baliye-3 me chalegi?? ”

More inside scoops from the tonti tonti wolld cup and the launch of the starlets… johny hawaldar..err gaddar and Saawariyaa in the next post.